Penn State protests: Who are the real victims?

One of the primary reasons I decided to go into social work was to find an outlet for my unwavering, sometimes inappropriate empathy. I have the ability to empathize with the “worst” of individuals—I won’t make a list of who, but there’s something about people doing terrible things that pulls at my heartstrings. How did they get to that point? How much hurt must they be experiencing to want to hurt others so badly?

From Deadspin.com

But sometimes my empathy is tested. This tends to happen most often when you throw privilege into the mix. Enter Penn State and the protests against the firing of Joe Paterno. Deadspin posted aslideshow of the “bros” long faces, highlighting that these kids are taking this seriously. Try as I might, I cannot take them seriously in return. A quick look through of the slideshow features, as a friend pointed out, primarily cis gendered white men. I’m assuming, and this is certainly an assumption, most of them are heterosexual. This is the battle they choose to fight. Nevermind the fact that there is actual Occupy Penn State action being organized, these kids decided the best thing to do was to protest against the justified firing of someone who turned a blind eye to children being abused.

I’m not saying that Paterno is the worst human being alive. I think Paterno was, however, acting to his own self-interest and to the interest of the Penn State community (or at least, the reputation or what he considered the interest of the Penn State community). However, it is my belief that fighting against child abuse and potentially preventing more children from abuse is worth some tarnishment to your reputation—a tarnishment that would have been much lighter than what he has to face now.

It’s also important to consider how this scandal would affect the survivors of Sandusky. Survivors of sexual assault often turn blame inward. Seeing the media portrayal of a school so upset over the firing of Paterno could potentially negatively affect these survivors. I can only imagine what would be going through their head—if only I hadn’t been there for Sandusky to abuse me, perhaps this trouble wouldn’t be happening. I hope, rather, that they are able to see what is happening as an example of why they are not at fault. The exposure of Sandusky and Paterno’s tight knit hold on the Penn State administration and the fact that there are several survivors may help the survivors conceptualize the severity of the situation and how out of their own control it really was.

But I can only hope. And as angry as I am at the Penn State protestors, I think it’s taking attention away from who the real victims are in this situation. It’s not these bro dawgs who are sad about losing their football coach. It’s the people who were severely and maliciously abused by Sandusky. There's some reasonable students at Penn State, fortunately, as seen in videos posted by Colorlines. I hope that while I can’t find empathy for them, that those protestors can find empathy for the survivors. 

The war on empathy: Reflections on Bin Laden's death

Believe me, I have plenty of other things I could be writing right now. Finals, for one. I could be writing about groups I've run, counter-transference, cognitive behavioral therapy, attachment theory. And I've made an honest effort today, but it's hard for me to shake what is going on in the world out of my mind.

It's times like this that convince me that this empathic streak is a curse rather than a blessing. Why do I feel mournful rather than jubilant over the death of someone who represents the deaths of thousands and a fearful paradigm shift in our country?

Death is death is death is death is death. It's never positive. It's never a victory. Osama Bin Laden dying does not bring any closure for me any more than it brings home any troops from overseas. Bin Laden is just another dead body in the war on terror.

And that's what upsets me so much. The man wasn't considered a threat anymore, and his body is simply a symbol of revenge. I understand and appreciate and honor that many people do probably feel closure or safer after this event, but I find our collective response troubling.

Pamela Gerloff put it best in her Huffington Post piece titled The Psychology of Revenge: Why We Should Stop Celebrating Osama Bin Laden's Death.

"Celebrating" the killing of any member of our species -- for example, by chanting "USA! USA!" and singing "The Star Spangled Banner" outside the White House or jubilantly demonstrating in the streets -- is a violation of human dignity. Regardless of the perceived degree of "good" or "evil" in any of us, we are all, each of us, human. To celebrate the killing of a life, any life, is a failure to honor life's inherent sanctity.

Plenty of people will argue that Osama bin Laden did not respect the sanctity of others' lives. But I say, "So what?" What makes us human is our ability to choose our own behavior. More specifically, it is our capacity to return good for evil, love for hate, dignity for indignity. While some consider Osama bin Laden to have been the personification of evil, he was nonetheless a human being.

Here's where it gets further complicated for me: I don't see how celebrating his death in this manner is doing anything except contributing to the same culture and mindset that led Bin Laden and all other nationalistic mass-murderers to do what they have done and will continue to do.

Until we can, as a society, learn how to become sobered by these experiences and learn how to respect all life, and thus respect all deaths with equal sanctity, these cycles of violence will continue. We will find ourselves in the very same position we are today, and it's not a healthy one. We are not a better people with Osama Bin Laden dead, and the events of 9/11 are not undone. We can, however, prevent these kinds of attacks in the future from happening again (which I feel would be the real honor and the real way those who have fallen can rest in peace) by fostering a world where any and all violence (government ordered or not) is mourned and all human life is dignified.